Gentle Moments
by mandaree1
Summary: She just wants to hold the baby.


**Disclaimer: I don't own Steven Universe!**

 **Title: Gentle Moments**

 **Summary: She just wants to hold the baby.**

 **Warnings: Overprotective Pearl and slightly jealous Amethyst**

 **Setting: Pre-series, obviously**

 **...**

Amethyst held the baby by herself once. It only lasted a few seconds.

"Ugh, phone is ringing." Greg said, haphazardly balancing Steven as he patted down his pockets. "I feel like I'm gonna drop him. Here. It'll only take a second, I promise."

Amethyst almost wished it'd last for years. Babies are hilarious to watch, and Steven is no exception. He lays like a weight in her arms, blinking fuzzy eyes. There's something alert about him, moreso than in other babies she's seen and helped ladies give birth to.

He's warm. Amethyst knows he's not Rose- never was, never will be- but she feels her gem respond to him like it did with her. She was soothed and happy with him by her side.

Bliss never lasts, however. Pearl practically snatches him from her arms, face a mask of fear and concern. "I don't trust you not to drop him."

And, yeah. That sucks. But Amethyst really can't argue that logic, so she lets it go.

* * *

Somehow, Garnet seems like an even greater force as she cradles Steven in one arm, the other holding up enough wood to kill a pro wrestler under their weight. Something about her looks more impressive, more fierce and loving. Pearl, on the other hand, is graceless and a bit high-pitched as she follows close behind, crying out for caution and perhaps relinquishment.

Amethyst swallows jealousy and a chunk of discarded 2X4. It's not like she wants the bond Steven, as a young toddler, has with Garnet and Pearl. That'd be silly. But she wouldn't mind being like Greg; a distant presence in his life who can teach him things and hug him, then hand him over at the end of the day. Somehow, even that feels impossible.

Then again, it's not like she's been trying, either. Other than the odd fist-bump and prank, she's left Steven to himself. Any time she _does_ give it a go usually ends in the boy being shuffled away by the other gems.

Are they scared she'll hurt them? She's rowdy and careless, sure, but it's not like Steven'll be finding himself anywhere near anything she could possibly hurt him on anytime soon.

Amethyst growls and clenches her fingers tight around the beams as she holds it still for Greg to nail. Rose had made such a big production about all of them being in his life, and now they're throwing a hissy fit about it? Five thousand is young, sure, but so is Vidalia, and she's an awesome ma.

"Careful! You're gonna break it in half."

"Huh? Oho. Whoops." She loosened her grip. "We don't gotta do that all over again, do we?"

"Hmm... some reinforcement and it'll be fine."

Thank the stars. She's so sick of wood.

* * *

It's a little while later- months? Feels like years- when Amethyst has a chance.

To a normal gem, that'd be mere seconds. Shame that she's not normal. Amethyst lives on the time clock of a human, and therefore has felt every day of her five thousand plus years slip by. Spending so long with nothing but time probably does that to a gem.

Part of her hesitates. It's hard to think that she's gonna play pretend for at least the next eighty years. He'll never know about Garnet. He'll never know about the war. He'll never know or see the Kindergarten.

That one hurts. Yeah, it's personal- it's gonna be painful- but it's more than that. She's not even allowed to visit, and how is that fair? Garnet can take comfort in fusion. As much as they might hate it, you can't destroy war memories. She can't even see her family in _secret_ , whereas they have the chance to indulge into their private don't-tell-Steven things as much as they want.

Then she soldiers up and makes her way over to sit with him. Waves lap at her boots. The sea spreads out wide before them both, meeting the sun and sky at the middle. Steven is playing his ukulele and singing. He's too young to know what his voice'll be like when things start dropping, but right now he's got a real talent. Hopefully he'll dance like a gem too.

"Come'on, Amethyst!" He nudges her side, then continues playing. Amethyst shrugs and sings backup, quietly accenting his words with her own raspy tune. Her voice is one thing she actually really likes about herself- an oasis amongst the armageddon of her form. His arm brushes her in a friendly manner.

It feels... nice.

Of course, that's when Pearl intervenes, hauling her up by the arm with a scowl only a true friend could look at without getting scorched by its' intensity.

"We have work to do." She chides. "Steven needs a home as soon as possible, but you'd rather waste time on nonsense?"

That hits a nerve. For one thing, she knows Pearl is being overbearing on purpose, and she hates it when she does that. She slams her feet down in the sand, shoulders straightening. "How is this 'wasting time'? Is it wasting time when you teach him constellations? When Garnet gets lunch with him?"

Her lip shivers with things unsaid. "Let's just go work."

She opens her mouth to say more, but the words she wants to say aren't child-appropriate so she shuts it again, reluctantly allowing herself to be herded away. "It was like five minutes, Pearl. If I didn't know better, I'd say you were keeping me from him."

Pearl doesn't reply. Amethyst's eyes light up with realization.

"You aren't serious. Pearl, you _know_ me. I wouldn't hurt him."

"I'm aware."

"Then why?"

"You _know_ why."

 _Your big mouth_ , Amethyst translates. Rage starts to build in her chest, which feels much better than the icy chill of loneliness. She wants to kick, scream, rage. But Steven is probably still on the beach, happily strumming away, unknowing of the fact that his two oldest guardians are chasing her away so he never learned the truth of how she was made.

Honestly, though, he _deserves_ to know. He has the right to meet her family and see the lackluster death a Kindergarten brings the planet.

But, still. She can't find it in her heart to punch Pearl. Not today.

She turns and tucks her fist into the weak link in the wall she'd created prior to all this. She hears the wood above scream, sees it start to fall, decides not to move.

* * *

Amethyst stays under the time it takes to make herself some short sleeves and returns, hair snarled and frizzy feeling. The mobility the change gives her is refreshing, and she takes to the sky as a bird with glee.

Pearl and Garnet hadn't dug her up yet. She knows, logically, that they just didn't want to panic Steven, but her heart says they didn't care, that they wanted her out of the way. Her emotions grab that block of bitter and stack it with the rest in the back, small alone and gigantic when piled with the others.

Finally she touches ground at the car wash, assuming the form of a cat. She picks the lock and slips inside.

Steven is sleeping soundly on a fluffy pillow and blanket thing, and she feels hesitant. A warm baby can stop breathing if a cool breeze hits it; what about fur? Has he grown big enough that she's okay to sleep next to him, or will he suffocate in the night? If she rolls onto him, is he strong enough to push her off?

Ugh. Parent stuff is exhausting.

Amethyst slides in next to the bed and wraps her tail around herself, trying to feel content while also reminding herself that she'll have to leave before morning.

Maybe things'll get easier when he's older. For now, this is what she's got to work with.

 **Author's Note: Basically I wanted to write about jealous Amethyst and Pearl being an overprotective mom. Let her be with her son, dangit.**

 **(Yes I'm still a bit salty over the idea that people call her a sister- not because she has that bond with Steven- but because she's "less mature." Rah.)**

 **-Mandaree1**


End file.
